When Gwenna married her husband Joe, they immediately began trying for kids. That did not go as planned. After trying everything under the sun to get pregnant over the next six years, they were considering adoption when her sister-in-law, Lorraine, offered to be a ɢᴇsᴛᴀᴛɪᴏɴᴀʟ ᴄᴀʀʀɪᴇʀ. Using ꜰʀᴏᴢᴇɴ ᴇᴍʙʀʏᴏs, Cullan Patrick was born.
Although the parents were very content with their healthy boy, Gwenna admits, “Having a sibling for my son was always in the back of my mind.” Of course, she knew this was a tall order. And she also confesses: “It felt sᴇʟꜰɪsʜ to me to ask God for another blessing when getting the first one was so ʜᴀʀᴅ.” But having a sister and a brother herself, she says, “I couldn’t imagine my life without them. I wanted that for my son.”
Then, four years later, at the age of 37, Gwenna began ɪɴᴊᴇᴄᴛɪᴏɴs for I.V.F with the intention of ꜰʀᴇᴇᴢɪɴɢ her ᴠɪᴀʙʟᴇ ᴇᴍʙʀʏᴏs. Interestingly, Gwenna is an sᴏɴᴏɢʀᴀᴘʜᴇʀ in the ᴏʙsᴛᴇᴛʀɪᴄs and ɢʏɴᴇᴄᴏʟᴏɢʏ ꜰɪᴇʟᴅ, so, as she told me, “I know over 35 is ᴀᴅᴠᴀɴᴄᴇᴅ ᴍᴀᴛᴇʀɴᴀʟ ᴀɢᴇ. Your ʀɪsᴋ of ꜰᴇᴛᴀʟ ᴀɴᴏᴍᴀʟɪᴇs increases.” It was now or never.
And then, fate intervened in the form of a phone call from her friend of 11 years, Emily, who is also an sᴏɴᴏɢʀᴀᴘʜᴇʀ. “She knew about my ʙᴀᴛᴛʟᴇs with ɪɴꜰᴇʀᴛɪʟɪᴛʏ and also the extent we went through to have our son.”
“The phone call from my sister-in-law and the call from Emily… I will never forget them. The feelings of ᴘᴀɴɪᴄ, ʀᴇʟɪᴇꜰ, ᴏᴠᴇʀᴡʜᴇʟᴍɪɴɢ ꜰᴇᴀʀ, ᴡᴏʀʀʏ that they wouldn’t go through with it, sʜᴏᴄᴋ. Emily wanted to do this for me. After some thought and discussion with her husband, she wanted to do it. Her previous three pregnancies were relatively easy with no ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟɪᴄᴀᴛɪᴏɴs. She enjoyed being pregnant, and she wanted to help me. My husband and I had a sit-down with Emily and Chris (her husband) to discuss logistics. And then it was a go. I had six little ᴇᴍʙʀʏᴏs ꜰʀᴏᴢᴇɴ from my ʀᴇᴛʀɪᴇᴠᴀʟ in the fall. Good, quality babies. In the following January, we began the process. By March, Emily was pregnant. We had ᴛʀᴀɴsꜰᴇʀʀᴇᴅ two ᴇᴍʙʀʏᴏs and one held on.”
Here are the emotional photos of the day in October 2015 when baby Paxton James arrived, captured by Ohio birth photographer Sarah Shambaugh:
“Somehow, we managed to keep the ɢᴇɴᴅᴇʀ unknown,” Gwenna told me, adding: “It was the best way to do it.” As Sarah says, how two sᴏɴᴏɢʀᴀᴘʜᴇʀs managed to keep the sᴇx of the baby a secret is beyond her!
About being in the ᴅᴇʟɪᴠᴇʀʏ room when Paxton was born, Gwenna explains: “Emily and I both have the same ⓄⒷ/ⒼⓎⓃ. We are also the sᴏɴᴏɢʀᴀᴘʜᴇʀs at our doctor’s practice. It made the ᴅᴇʟɪᴠᴇʀʏ so much better to have that connection with Dr. Costa. She knew the circumstances. She knew what it meant. The ᴅᴇʟɪᴠᴇʀʏ mattered to her.”
She goes on to say, “I think she wanted to involve Joe and me as much as possible. That’s why she had me ᴅᴇʟɪᴠᴇʀ the baby. I ᴄᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴏʀᴅ. I did skin-to-skin.”
Gwenna says this about Emily: She did for me what I couldn’t do for myself. Absolutely selfless, complete compassion. So many people talk about doing good things or how ʜᴏʀʀɪʙʟᴇ they feel about some of the world’s ɪssᴜᴇs. It’s talk. No action. Emily acted and because of that, she changed the world. Granted it is my world. My husband’s world.
“My son’s world. My family’s world. But it doesn’t matter. She did it all with a smile on her face.”
As for Sarah, she said, “This birth is in my top favorite births, hands down. The emotion was so raw and ʜᴜᴍʙʟɪɴɢ that day.” She says everyone cried, including her. “I just usually keep my ᴄᴏᴍᴘᴏsᴜʀᴇ and smile for their happiness. But this was so different! Even the doctor cried!”
Sarah recalls one moment in particular: “The second Dr. Costa asked the intended momma if she wanted to ᴅᴇʟɪᴠᴇʀ her baby, her face lit up. At this point, they had no idea if the baby was a boy or a girl. She got to announce it to everyone! It’s a BOY! Laughter and excitement filled the room. Not a dry eye in the room. Not a single face without a smile!”
